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‘Cute’ is the Highest Compliment You Can Give Your Wife

March 29, 2012

My friend Joyce recently reminded me that ‘cute’ is the pinnacle of female compliments and trumps ‘Pretty,’ ‘Hot’ or whatever. For guys, this is important to know but it takes years of practice to master the use this word because it’s not part of our natural lexicon prior to marriage.

As Joyce pointed out, women love to hear the word ‘cute’ to describe or compliment anything about them – Cute hair. Cute shoes. Cute outfit. Cute house. Cute dress…etc. From experience, the superlative to cute is “SO cute!” This compliment is even harder for guys to pull off, but it is the highest of compliments a girl can receive from another girl. Remember, women dress, do their hair and keep their house tidy for other women – not for guys. So, when another woman compliments them with a ‘cute’ modifier, that lady has received the seal of approval from one of her peers. For example, if your wife has hosted a Bunko night (Bunko is some game the girls get together and play around my neighborhood) you will notice that not only does the house need to look like its being featured in Martha Stewart Living before her friends show up, but your wife will spend more time getting ready and looking nice for her friends than for a date night with you. So, it’s not you dude. They all do it.

This is a difficult word for guys to work into their vocabulary. In fact, I’m not sure most of us know its real meaning beyond it being used to describe a puppy. Guys don’t have toys that they want called cute. That is a girl word. Guys don’t go up to other guys and say, “The real-tree camo finish on your turkey gun is cute. It will go well with your hunting outfit.” Guys don’t have cute motorcycles, cute trucks, cute fly-rods, cute bass boats, cute duck blinds…etc. And that is why newlywed guys will answer the following question completely wrong when inevitably posed by their new bride at some point early on in their marriage: “Do you think my friend is cute?” Guy: “Yeah, she is totally HOT.” Wrong answer dude! This is a classic rookie fumble that will cost you dearly. My experience is that women, in general, don’t use the word ‘hot’ and don’t like to be called ‘hot’ because it makes them feel self-conscience or as though other women might think they look trampy. Women want to feel pretty. Not trampy. And even though ‘hot’ is the highest compliment a guy can give in our limited jargon, don’t use it to describe other women in front of your wife. In fact, lose the term altogether. During the summer, just say it feels ‘warm’ outside today. That way you don’t make a mistake.

For a woman, the word ‘cute’ is a complex term with a multitude of meanings behind it. It means pretty, desirable, fashionable, smart, confident, charming, clever, endearing, appealing and a lot of other things all rolled up into this one little word. They know what it means, so you should also. Timing and practice will allow you to effectively work this word into your daily conversation, and once you learn to use it effectively it will totally save your hide. For example, if your wife says, “I feel like I look so fat in this dress.” You say, “No honey, I think it looks SO cute on you.” Voila’ – Disaster averted.

Thanks for the blog suggestion Joyce! I am always looking for ideas.

© Johnny Hea – 2012 All Rights Reserved


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  1. This post is SO cute! Your proper use of the term to describe your wife’s dress is perfect, unlike when my husband used the term to describe how I looked in formal attire for a recent event – amazing, beautiful, gorgeous would have sufficed, not cute.

    He will be reading this post 🙂

    • We are sometimes not that great with our adjectives or our timing. Training and patience. I’m thinking of starting a class.

  2. nitin kumar permalink

    keep it up

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